For Sale!!
Free to a good home. One male two-year-old, slightly underweight, long hippie hair, who has in the last 24 hours eaten a tube of toothpaste (flouride free) and 9 pieces of gum (zylotol free), filled a toilet with an entire canister of lysol wipes, colored my-25-year old Cabbage Patch baby’s head green (with a marker), thinks his new age idea of “potty trained” actually has nothing to do with a potty but rather peeing off the back deck in the grass, can’t keep his clothes on EVER, and just stood up in a dining room chair, grabbed his brothers cup of milk and peed in it. For more info or to see pics please call 555-1234.
Also needed: Details on an existing instituion for mommies who can no longer laugh and cry independently and who in this most recent incident was more upset at seeing organic milk wasted…LOL
